#139 Helen Zuman “Mating in Captivity”

After some short technical difficulties, I finally connected with today’s guest, Helen Zuman, a tree-hugging dirt worshipper devoted to turning waste into food and the stinky guck of experience into fertile, fragrant prose. She holds a BA in Visual and Environmental Studies from Harvard and a Half-FA in memoir from Hunter College. Raised in Brooklyn, she lives with her husband in Beacon, NY and Black Mountain, NC.

She is the author of Mating in Captivity (She Writes Press 2018), a memoir of her five years, post-Harvard, in a cult with a radical take on sex and relationships. Mating in Captivity received a starred review from Kirkus, was named a Kirkus Best Indie Memoir of 2018, was a finalist in Creative Nonfiction for the Community of Literary Magazines and Presses’ 2019 Firecracker Award, and was both first runner-up in memoir and a finalist for First Horizon and Grand Prize honors in the 2020 Eric Hoffer Awards. Other work has appeared in The New Farmers Almanac, in Communities and Livelihood magazines, and on the Foundation for Intentional Community’s website (ic.org). 

Mating in Captivity: When recent Harvard grad Helen Zuman moved to Zendik Farm in 1999, she was thrilled to discover that the Zendiks used go-betweens to arrange sexual assignations, or “dates,” in cozy shacks just big enough for a double bed and a nightstand. Here, it seemed, she could learn an honest version of the mating dance – and form a union free of “Deathculture” lies. No one spoke the truth: Arol, the Farm’s matriarch, crushed any love that threatened her hold on her followers’ hearts. An intimate look at a transformative cult journey, Mating in Captivity shows how stories can trap us and free us, how miracles rise out of crisis, how coercion feeds on forsaken self-trust.

In addition to cults, we also talk about the journey to trust oneself, the “infinite growth myth,” gift circles, her connection to a well balanced eco-village that is doing intentional living well and how she takes care of herself (no social media!). I can personally highly recommend her book even for those not remotely curious about how one gets pulled into a cult. It’s extremely well written and uniquely empowering to hear some of the more difficult details of her story.

Looking for an intentional community or wondering about the health of one you’re currently in? Helen’s article may be of help to you. And if you do have friends, family or loved ones you fear are wrapped up in a cult, eh hm, political party, then Helen recommends some resources written by therapist and cult expert Steven Hassan. You can tune in to hear the best thing Helen’s Mom did easing her exit from the cult mind-control.

Today’s show was engineered by Nick Panken of Freedom Highway.

Our show music is from Shana Falana !!!

Feel free to email me, say hello: she@iwantwhatshehas.org

Leave me a voicemail with your thoughts or a few words about who inspires you! (845) 481-3429

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#138 “Naturalist and Educator” Susan Hereth and Honoring the life of RBG

Susan Hereth is the Education Director at the Kingston YMCA Farm Project. Susan holds a BA in geography from SUNY New Paltz and an MS in education from University of Albany.  Susan’s strengths are in development and implementation of experiential learning opportunities for students of all ages as well as professional development workshops for educators. At the Kingston YMCA Farm Project, Susan’s role is to create, enrich, and supervise the youth development program which is focused on teen employment and learning using urban farming,  place based projects, the local environment, cooking, and social justice as the context for skill and job development.  She is the former Education Coordinator at Scenic Hudson and Education Director at Hudson Valley Seed. In 2010 she received the highest recognition from the US Environmental Protection Agency given to the public- an Environmental Quality Award. Susan is a certified Master Naturalist through Cornell University. Susan was the volunteer Chair of the Environmental Literacy Committee for the New York State Outdoor Education Association as well as co-chair for annual conferences in 2009, 2011 and 2015. She received the NYSOEA Service Award in 2009. Susan served as an advisor and resource for Teaching the Hudson Valley. Susan loves to explore vernal pools, count glass eels, and she is the steward of multiple bee hives.  She can be reached at susan@kingstonymcafarmproject.org.

Follow the work of the Kingston YMCA Farm Project:  Facebook  @Kingtson YMCA Farm Project or Instagram at @yfarmkingston

The Youth Crew at the YMCA Farm Project made a new video called, ”Truth Talk.” The premiere will be launched on You Tube at 7pm on Friday Sept 25, and be public after that. They have an event created on Facebook where they will post the link.

“Truth Talk” – content was written by the teens based on their antiracist work this summer. Directed, filmed, and edited by Alonzo “AJ” Jordan Jr..

The Summer Youth Crew worked on antiracist learning and action this summer. They read Stamped Remix, painted a Say Their Names utility box mural on Schwenk Drive, discussed and reflected on all they were learning, had guest speakers share their experiences, and teamed up with local florists and artists to share the Say Their Names Memorial along the fence at the greenhouse and farm. Visit the Memorial on Saturday Sept 26 or Sunday Sept 27, 12-5pm, for an opportunity to have a tour or ask questions of youth crew members.

In the second half of the show I pay homage to the Honorable Ruth Bader Ginsburg with a little help from Ruth herself, March Gallagher, Ruth Ungar and more.

Here is the information on this Sunday’s Healing event taking place at Academy Green Park in Kingston from 3-5pm. Come any time and stay as long or short as you’d like!

Today’s show was engineered by Manuel Blas of La Dosis Perfecta.

Our show music is from Shana Falana !!!

Feel free to email me, say hello: she@iwantwhatshehas.org

Leave me a voicemail with your thoughts or a few words about who inspires you! (845) 481-3429

** Please: SUBSCRIBE to the pod and leave a REVIEW wherever you are listening, it helps other users FIND IT

http://iwantwhatshehas.org/podcast

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