229 “The Bullied Brain” with Jennifer Fraser

Today my guest is JenniferFraser, best-selling author and award-winning educator. Her online courses and workshops provide dynamic lessons in the impact neuroscience has on personal development and culture change. Her previous book, Teaching Bullies: Zero Tolerance on the Court or in the Classroom, explores what happens when the bully is a teacher or coach. Her new book, The Bullied Brain: Heal Your Scars and Restore Your Health, delves into how bullying affects the brain and how the brain can heal. Learn more at bulliedbrain.com

I’ve been glued to this book which is rich with information about bully culture, the damage it causes our brains, and what we can do about it. It’s a sad reality that our culture is so seeped in bullying and abuse — from children’s playgrounds to the upper echelons of leadership — that we’ve come to normalize the behavior and overlook the wreckage. This bullying paradigm has parents, teachers and coaches believing they must be tough to the point of emotional abuse in order for children to acquire the grit and resilience needed to attain excellence in a competitive world. The research shows however that the bullied brain correlates with failure to perform, substance abuse, aggressive behavior, chronic disease and mental illness.

Some of the topics we get into are the bullying paradigm, toxic masculinity vs. toxic stress, the “invisible” brain damage cause by bullying and toxic stress, open vs. fixed mindsets, building resilience, and in honor of Juneteenth I share some personal thoughts on how slavery was an extreme form of bullying and how we should consider what we’ve learned from Jennifer when understanding how to heal from it’s legacy.

Today’s show was engineered by Manuel Blas of Radio Kingston.

Our show music is from Shana Falana !!!

Feel free to email me, say hello: she@iwantwhatshehas.org

** Please: SUBSCRIBE to the pod and leave a REVIEW wherever you are listening, it helps other users FIND IT

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#187 Anyssa Lucena “Confident Climbers”

Today’s guest is the very inspiring Anyssa Lucena. She helps women climbers gain confidence by teaching them how to overcome self-limiting beliefs, get stronger and live an empowered life through climbing. As a former rock climber, when I heard about Anyssa and her work, my curiosity led me to her website where I learned more about her background, and her story was so inspiring that I wanted to invite her on the show. Due to her schedule, we recorded our conversation last week, and I play that for you today. As you’ll hear, after having 3 kids, Anyssa suddenly realized she was deeply unhappy with her life.  Something was missing.  Her youngest was 9 months old when she asked her husband for a divorce. She was 38, suddenly a divorced – single mom of 3 kids, ages 5, 3, and 9 months and had no idea whatsoever what her future would look like.  She had left her wall street job when she had kids, and although she was well educated and experienced, she couldn’t imagine returning to a corporate environment.  She had no idea what her future would look like, but she had faith that somehow, things would work out.  Spoiler alert, things have turned out well for Anyssa, but getting there wasn’t always easy and rock climbing helped her find her way. It’s surprising how metaphorical rock climbing is for life in general.  Her story really resonated with me and I hope you enjoy it too.

Some of my favorite parts of our conversation today are about exploring fears, self compassion, mom guilt, “divorce arms,” internal validation, shifts in mindset and celebrating failure. So good!

As I mention at the end of the show, here’s the article about Menstrual Huts in India.

And here’s the article I referenced about addiction to money and power that Marielena and I will touch upon during the September 13th show.

Today’s show was engineered by Ian Seda of Radio Kingston.

Our show music is from Shana Falana !!!

Feel free to email me, say hello: she@iwantwhatshehas.org

** Please: SUBSCRIBE to the pod and leave a REVIEW wherever you are listening, it helps other users FIND IT

http://iwantwhatshehas.org/podcast

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